Chapter 4 Great Expectations
Everyone wants someone who cares about them but can they actually care for someone other than themselves? They have an expectation of grace
And kindness, and perhaps a favor and advantage.
Not everyone actually cares. They may have a deceitful reason for befriending someone. They expect capitulation not companionship.
A compassionate heart can sense a person’s need and
Meet it by reaching out in friendship. There’s no other motivation than to be supportive.
A callous person might see weakness and exploit it, using a relationship as a means to an end. This is tragic emotional abuse that cuts both ways. It dehumanizes and demoralizes people.
Then there are people who are so desperate for love and attention that they will “buy” friends. Since this kind of relationship is merely transactional, it has no meaning.
I’d like to share what makes friendship real and emotionally beneficial:
A friend ought to be somewhat of a good influence in our lives and offer some benefit we otherwise would not have. They should be indispensable, and you should be indispensable to them. Their presence in our lives ought to hold real meaning.
Second, a friend must be honest and trustworthy. A friendship built on lies falls apart eventually.
You should be yourself without pretense. Be straight forward without fear of rejection, because
If someone doesn’t accept you for who you are, you’re better off knowing that as soon as possible.
Third, a friend is consistent with their attitude toward you. You know where they stand. Someone who turns on you is not a friend. A friend is loyal. A true friend sees and believes in the best of you. If something can come between two friends, it can be resolved. This would be possible because those
Parties have respect for one another.
They say you can pick your friends, but not your family. Sometimes people come into our lives and we interact with them out of convenience and proximity. We need to be intentional in our relationships. Are they healthy? Are you just going along to get along, or do you share something meaningful with your circle of acquaintances?
Some people have difficulty getting along with people, but I believe that even these people can have a few people to which they can confide. Maybe they have such a guard up to protect themselves, but they have a way of knowing who to trust. That’s just being smart, not being stuck- up.
Friends should inspire us. Do you look up to your friend, or are you trying to pull someone
Up? It could be a little of both, but a close friend should lift you up.
The writers of the Proverbs encourage their readers to seek wise friends for best results. They help us avoid the pitfalls of life and can guide us with good advice.
A friend should be going the same direction with similar goals; anything that keeps you together. Like King Solomon said, How can you walk together unless you agree?
